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Turisas - Battle Metal (2004 - Century Media)

Battle Metal

This release by Finnish small village dwellers Turisas wouldn't hack me off so much if it didn't have a nasty cheese violin/synth constantly in most of their songs. The arrangements actually seem to drive the main melodies of many of the songs and i just can't abide with it being a fiend for guitar mastery. Their guitar work underneath is mediocre usual thrash chug-a-long riffing, which might be useable in a different environment.
Oh man! Save me from the medieval folk festival on acid gone wrong crossover with cheesy power metal. For fuck's sake, one section on 'Midnight Sunrise' sounds like it could be backing to a nursery rhyme! Ahhhhrrrrgggg!! Some forest dwelling fiends on continental Europe may enjoy this but keep it away from me! The Warlord (one of the founding members) says that “the audience for our kind of folk/heathen/battle-metal has grown enormously” – what to about 5 people? Bleh! I accept that the audience for heathen/folk metal such as recent Graveland and Skyforger has grown but that is good stuff, not cheesy comedy metal like this. Its like wannabe Finntroll but…worse.
I feel like I'm watching Braveheart or Robin Hood forever and this music is the emotive soundtrack to it. I might enjoy this music if I was actually riding horseback, slaying many with a large battle-axe but carrying a stereo on a horse is impractical.
I enjoy when songs have spoken word sections, as it can enhance the atmosphere and listening experience. 'Unas Slayer Of The Gods' by Nile is an excellent example, but Turisas take the piss with an entire track just over three minutes in length of just some gruff voiced Finn talking about some bollocks legend.
Aggh maybe I'm in misanthropic mode and can't appreciate anything, but then again I think this rage has been induced by something else...*looks at Turisas CD*…
Reviewed By - hail erebus

Slay The Masses Score...4.5/10

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